Rollercoaster
by Misanagi
Summary: Quatre makes a discovery on his birthday that changes the way he sees his life.


Rollercoaster By Misanagi  
  
Rating: PG13  
  
Warnings: A little angsty, some sap, Quatre POV  
  
Pairings: 0?+04  
  
Summary: Quatre makes a discovery on his birthday that changes the way he sees his life.  
  
Archive: www.fanfiction.net/~Misanagi, eventually Shades and Echoes.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or the characters used on this fic.  
  
Feedback: Yes please! Misanagi_zzz@hotmail.com  
  
Notes: This fic is a gif for Anne. Thanks for everything!  
  
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The day of my sixth birthday my father took me to an amusement park. It was the first time we went out together and the last one too. He was a busy man - I was taught to understand that from an early age, so we didn't spend that much time together but I loved him anyway.  
  
He came into my room that morning and announced that we would spend the day together, the two of us, alone. I think that I had never been anywhere alone with my father until that day. There was always someone around, being the servants, business associates or one of my sisters.  
  
He asked me where did I want to go and at first I was reluctant to tell him. My father had always encouraged educational activities like reading or visiting museums. I didn't know how he would react when I told him that I didn't want to do anything that would be beneficial for my education and that I just wanted to act my age and play.  
  
He surprised me when he smiled after I told him in a shy voice what I wanted to do.  
  
"Whatever you want, Quatre. Today is your day." And he made sure it was that way. He took me to the amusement park and let me ride on everything I wanted. He even went up with me on a couple of rides.  
  
The amusement park also had a small Zoo. I remember walking through the cages, looking at the animals inside and hearing the voice of my father telling me little facts about each of them.  
  
"See, Quatre? That's an ostrich. Is the biggest bird in the world and it can't fly but it can run as fast as any horse."  
  
"That one is a Greek turtle, it moves very slowly but it has a very hard shell that protects it from any harm, so whenever it feels threatened it hides within it."  
  
"Those are lions. The one with the mane is the male and the ones without it are the females. They are the ones in charge of bringing the food and are really good hunters."  
  
We didn't even have to push the button that allowed the virtual tour guide to tell us about the animals, my dad knew enough about them already.  
  
As we were leaving I spotted it for the first time. I didn't know what it was exactly but I knew I wanted to try it. It was so tall, the tallest thing in the park, and I just wanted to be up there, to know what it felt to be that high and look down at the world bellow.  
  
"Do you want to try the rollercoaster, Quatre?" asked my father, noticing the longing look on my face. I smiled widely and before I knew it, I was hugging my father's arm and asking him if he really meant it.  
  
I was startled when I saw a small flash of light and noticed that there was man in front of us, holding a camera with a big smile on his face. My father bought that picture and eventually put it in his office. That's why it was so hard for me to argue with him when we were there. I used to see that picture and the memories of that day came back and I couldn't make myself be angry with him anymore.  
  
After my father was sure that I could ride on the rollercoaster without any problems, he took me there. He sat beside me and we both waited anxiously for the ride to start. It was heaven. I loved every moment of it, every turn every twist and every fall. I screamed until my throat hurt and kept my eyes open as the world passed by me at a rapid speed.  
  
When the ride stopped I was still smiling and I asked my father if we could ride again, even though I was expecting a no in return. Many people think that because I came from a wealthy family, I had everything I wanted, that my parents probably spoiled me giving me more than I could desire. That wasn't exactly true. I did have everything I needed but I was taught to be moderated too. I didn't receive thirty birthday presents but one; I could only have one dessert every night and I was given an allowance depending of how I was doing in my studies. A company as important as Winner Enterprises could never have a CEO that didn't know the value of money and hard work.  
  
That's why I was so amazed when my father told me that we could ride once more. The second time was as enjoyable as the first. I could feel the adrenaline running through my veins and for a moment, I closed my eyes and let the movements be the only thing I allowed myself to feel.  
  
It was over too soon and my father and I prepared to leave the park. We got into the car and after we had driven five blocks I threw up. It was the best day of my childhood!  
  
* * *  
  
By the time I turned ten my father was working overtime and I rarely saw him. I don't remember exactly when it started but whenever I felt lonely or sad I went to an amusement park and found a rollercoaster to ride. When you are turning at a fast speed and the wind is hitting your face, you don't have time to think about loneliness. I stopped throwing up but I never stopped feeling the excitement that ride caused me.  
  
After I met instructor H, I didn't really have time to think of anything else than my training. Before I knew it, I was on my way to earth, piloting the biggest rollercoaster I had ever ridden. Every time I sat on Sandrock's cockpit and grabbed the controls I felt, for a moment, for a single moment, like the exited six year old that was waiting for the ride to start.  
  
After the wars were over and we decided to destroy our Gundams, I returned to L4. I was very busy for a while. I was managing my family business and all the new responsibilities allowed me to use work as a place to hide. However, nothing lasts forever and before I knew it, the company wasn't demanding all of my time. That meant that when I came home to my big and empty house, I wasn't tired enough to just go to sleep. I noticed how quiet everything was, how all the people I talked to were business associates and how abandoned my violin felt, sitting in the music room, waiting for someone to play it.  
  
It was the day of my twentieth birthday and I had never felt lonelier in my entire life. I refused to go to work and stayed in my bed until midday, simply thinking about the person I had become and the friends I had lost. That's when I decided that something needed to change and I was ready to take the first step.  
  
I went to the same place my father and I went when I was six. It was different; there were some new attractions and others that they had already closed but my rollercoaster was still there. I bought a single ticket and took my seat. I closed my eyes and waited for the emotions to take over. A waited a moment but nothing came. There was no adrenalin rush, no excitement, no dizziness, just the feeling of the wind on my face. I opened my eyes and noticed that we were in the middle of the ride. I looked down as the car twisted and turned but nothing happened.  
  
I guess that a war changes people more that they know. After piloting a Gundam and feeling the exhilaration of the G forces, violently pulling me in every direction, there is nothing that can remotely compare to that. Maybe I can say that the rollercoaster was my first Gundam, the first place I felt alive. Now I had lost them both.  
  
I made my way out of the rollercoaster ride with a gloom expression on my face. I felt lost, more lost than I had ever felt.  
  
"Quatre?"  
  
I heard the voice speaking from behind me and every feeling I had missed on the rollercoaster came back at me. I could recognize his voice anywhere and the sound of him speaking my name was enough to make the world move in a way that I had almost forgotten.  
  
I turned around and looked at him. He had changed; he looked more mature but he still had that look in his eyes that made me love him so much.  
  
"What are you doing here?" I asked as I failed my attempt of faking a smile.  
  
"I was looking for you."  
  
"Why?" I asked, puzzled.  
  
"I wanted to wish you a happy birthday."  
  
In that moment I knew my life was about to change. It wasn't that I was feeling lonely or that he had remembered my birthday. It was the look on his eyes and the fact that I had finally recognized what it was. He looked at me they way I looked at my rollercoaster; like someone waiting to return to the place where he belonged.  
  
That's when I realized that I didn't need a rollercoaster anymore. I had him.  
  
Trowa and I spent the day together and the earth never stopped moving. We talked and I felt the world turn, we looked at each other and the adrenaline ran through my veins, he asked me to stay together, and I was falling. I said yes, and we went home together. It was the best day of my life and this time, I didn't throw up.  
  
*Owari* 


End file.
